A reminder to feel your feelings
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Hi friend, If you grew up in an immigrant or first-generation household, you probably didn’t see a lot of emotional processing happening out loud. Our parents and caregivers didn’t have time to sit with their feelings—they were surviving, working, building, protecting, pushing forward. And if no one ever modeled emotional awareness for us, it makes sense that we weren’t taught how to feel our feelings, name them, or talk about them either. What does that mean for us now? Sometimes, when we’re in relationships with people who do express their feelings openly, we misunderstand them. Their need to talk, cry, or process can look like “sulking” or “wasting time.” It can even feel uncomfortable or confusing. But here’s the truth: We’re the ones who need to learn how to sit with our feelings instead of rushing to fix them. That urge to immediately “stop the feeling” is a First Gen survival skill, but it’s not always a helpful one in adulthood. Slowing down is hard when it’s unfamiliar. Slowing down is hard when it wasn’t modeled. Slowing down is hard when your body was trained to respond, solve, and keep moving. But if you can pause—even for a moment—you create space to move beyond just surviving. It is possible. You can do this. And you don’t have to do it perfectly, just start with a slow breath and one honest feeling. With you in this, Jose 💛
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Coaching with Jose
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